Ode to Capn Platy. A eulogy to a dearly departed blog.

Captain RagDoll of the ship “Thalion” (The Dauntless) is called to say a few words in honor of the dearly departed blog. A dark haired pirate sitting amongst a group known as ‘The Shout Boxers’ stands up. She strides up to the podium garbed in black. She is wearing a black leather tricorn hat (if you look closely you can see the embossed outline of a skull and crossed swords) adorned with an ebony ostrich plume. A black sash replaces the scarlet one that usually adorns her waist. Her ‘fancy’ sword hangs at her side, and a black ribbon in honor of Cap’n Platy and his recent foray into fencing adorns the hilt. This is a solemn occasion that calls for ‘fancy dress’. She clearly has taken fashion tips from the 'Dread Pirate Robert' what with the long sleeved black shirt, dark pants and black leather boots. She removes her hat, nods towards the gathered crowd, takes a deep breath (As deep as her black leather corset will allow) and… She begins to speak… Captain, oh fellow Captain! Oh wonderful blog that we knew so well as 'The Platypus Society'! In the grand scheme of the Blogosphere, we hardly knew 'ye. *Blows schnoz enthusiastically into starched hanky after choking down sobs* No longer shall we meander the halls of such a fine vessel of writing. No longer shall there be merriment, no longer shall there be such interesting bits of World Wide Web linkage. Oh where, oh where shall the epic poem 'Rhyme of the Senile Bus Patron' reside? No more shall we be able to kept up to date on the antics of idiots naming animals such things as Zonkeys. Who shall teach us such fine drinking games? Without your inspiration, I would never have had so much fun watching American Idol. Do you remember?

Pick a judge. Everytime your judge says a certain word everyone else takes a drink. Here are the words: Simon: Competition Randy: Dog or Yo (pick one) Paula: Love (pick one) Whenever any judge uses the word "absolutely" everyone drinks. It should make watching the show much more enjoyable.

Ahh.Good Times. *Sighs and dabs at eyes with corner of hanky. No, not the corner used to blow nose. Eyeliner is now flowing freely down cheeks a la Tammy Faye.* Why were you taken from us so soon? You were such a fine blog. A merry blog; an informative blog; a serious blog. And you were such a source of humor. Why, I remember one post, *insert half choked forced laughter here* in which you posed the question, “What would happen if Satan's turtle ate the Virgin Mary Grilled Cheese?” Why, you even suggested that Goldenpalace.com buy the turtle to make the showdown happen. That question had me occupied for hours! Ah ha ha ha ha ha! *Begins to wail. Is comforted by mediumlargephil and other ShoutBoxers while Cap’n Jeff tosses RagDoll a fancy new bandana. The Tammy Faye look is beginning to scare the children. She bravely collects herself, and attempts to go on.* Are there to be no more careless shantys? No more swigs of mental grog? Because of you I became aware of the existance of Darth Tater! *Breaks down into hysterics* I jes’ can’t go on! It’s too difficult! PLEASE! Not the male enhancement ads! Noooo! Not the pictures of the cat! *Sob*sniff*hearty nose blowing* *Is finally led away and helped back to her seat. Nearly sits on sword, and sobs give way to rampant cursing. Remains in seat for rest of eulogies.*