Attention Virus creators ,hackers and assholes...

Dear Big Time Loser who does not have a life and is wasting programming genius because of laziness, (The one who invented spyware and computer hijacking programs. Yeah you. This letter is for you.) I just lost hours of my life. Hours I will never get back, EVER, all because SOMEONE who has no fugging clue clicked on a damn pop up or sketchy website and infected a computer with spyware. SPY SHERIFF SUCKS. You made me do a clean install of Windows on this already craptastic Dell laptop. Not only did I have to deal with regaining control of a computer, I had to deal with a whiny complainer who denied all responsibility of clicking on said virus in any way shape or form. Because of you, I pulled my hair out, skipped a meal and snacked on a BAG of Ruffles Cheddar & Sour Cream Chips coupled with many bottles of water. Because of you, my office is still a mess and I am crabby and irritable. Because of you, I have to reinstall ALL programs and files. (The heavens be praised that I lack the common sense of a cheerio and have all of my important stuff backed up in case of such travesty.) Do me a favor. Apply your evil genius elsewhere. How about inventing a pill that prevents the spread of ass cheeks due to having them sat on all day? Why don't you come up with some sort of program to make DMV a somewhat tolerable experience? How about it? Or how about something useful like some sort of device that will prevent cell phones from ringing in movie theaters? Or better yet, make it so that if someone starts to talk on their phone during a movie the phone falls apart into a bajillion pieces? I am tired of being a DIY computer tech. I am too cheap/paranoid to take my computer to a stranger and have them fix it for me. I am also too poor to just toss the fother mucker off of a bridge and traipse down to my local BestBuy and purchase another one. I curse you. I petition to any and all in a position to grant my pleas that the fleas of a dozen alley cats invade your shorts. Preferably while you are in a comprimising position, in a movie theater, stuck in rush hour traffic, or other such inconvenient place. May the center of your back become a breeding ground for acne or a poison oak/ivy rash in the middle of summer, while you are in an unconditioned room or car. It is my sincere wish that you experience Montezumas revenge while in a crowded public venue or perhaps when you have run out of toilet paper in your home. You rotten bastid. I hate you. I hate you. That is all. Sincerely, The Crazy Bitch you should run from(far and fast)should you even hear a rumor that she is within 100 miles from you.